Seduction in Relationships

I'm going to steal a whole big post from Brian, and hope he doesn't mind. This is from the Hypnotic Techniques Exchange archives of 2002, and I think it is too well said to linger in obscurity:

For possible discussion on how seducton skills crossover into
relationships, edited from a post I made to another list:

--- In mindlist@y..., ____ wrote:

> I am engaged to be married. Thus, I am not all that interested in
> seduction skills.

You should be interested in seduction skills, you should be very interested in them.

Seduction is not just about manipulating some girl you don't know into having sex with you . . . yes, that is an application of seduction that some but not all folks buy into . . . seduction is about attraction and making a person you feel good about feel good too.

Just because you're engaged or married doesn't mean you should stop trying to learn new ways to make your lover feel good and to experience new pleasures or share new experiences.

While much of the discussion of seduction techniques on this or most of the other lists devoted to the topic are about methods to seduce those with whom a person doesn't have a sexual relationship or ways to move a relationship into a more intimate arena . . . and that may be the part of the deal that you or I don't have current interest in, that narrow and specific application . . . but there's a lot more to it than that, positive things that can help your mate experience things with you in new and wonderful ways.

Some people seem to think that a seduction ends with sex . . . bag 'em bang 'em and eject 'em, a rather shallow view of life and relationships . . . it's not true . . . the seduction never ends, in any healthy relationship, where the romance is kept alive, vibrant, and wonderfully real, the seduction continues . . . sometimes with major moves like that unexpected trip to a restraunt to celebrate her unbirthday . . . or in small little things like the tilt of the head, the tender touch behind the left earlobe, and the whisper of 'I love you' as you lips touch in a crowded shopping mall where time has stopped for a moment and only the two of you exist.

Stop thinking of seduction in terms of Cassanova rouges roaming the countryside manipulating innocent milkmaids . . . it's more than that . . . and it can be so much more positive. Engaged, steady, married folks . . . anyone in a committed relationship . . . should be learning as much about seduction as they can . . . as seduction is about bringing pleasure to another person, intensifying experiences, and giving that person a wonderful gift . . . part of keeping the relationship vibrant and alive.

All by Brian David Phillips.